Sakura
by Yoippari
Summary: The Sanzo Party comes upon an inn...run by 4 beautiful women. They decide to stay one night, and then another, and then another, etc. It's Humorous at first, but then it gets dramatic and a little romantic. Some OoC and, not too bad, shounen ai. R
1. The Tabemono Inn

This is my first story! Hope you like it! R&R for me okay? I don't own Saiyuki, but I do own Rio and Rose, and partly own Ritsuko and Uma! Also read my friend's story, Attack of the Chibi Sanzo's!

center***

The Sanzo-ikkou all sat in the jeep, as Hakkai drove for the umpteenth time. The rain came down heavily. Their hair stuck to their foreheads, and their clothes were all soaked. Hakkai chuckled. "Maybe we should find an inn." Goku pointed between his and Sanzo's heads. "Like that one?" Gojyo put his hand on Goku's head and rubbed it. "Yeah, Einstein. Like that!"

They drove up to the inn and got out of the jeep, which transformed back into Hakuryu, who landed on Hakkai's shoulder.

They walked into the inn, and saw no one at the front desk. The Sanzo-ikkou walked up to the desk and saw a door behind it. A loud crash came from behind, and girls' voices were heard. "That's it, Uma! Get the hell out of my kitchen!" "Make me, shorty!" "AGH!" A woman walked out of the door. She had brown hair with one green stripe on the left side of it, and with one on the right side. She saw the guys and gasped. "Oh! Rio! Get your butt out here! We've got customers." She turned back to them. "I'm am so sorry! I didn't know you guys were here." Hakkai smiled his usual smile. "It's all right."

Just then a short girl with brown hair, red bangs and an orange bandana walked out. "Hello." She said happily. "Uh…" The other woman sighed. "Welcome to the Tabemono Inn!* My name is Rose. This is Rio, the owner. Our cook is Uma, and…well, the other one is Ritsuko." Sanzo raised an eyebrow. "She's the owner?" "Yes." She smiled again, just as more crashes were heard.

The short one, Rio, rolled her eyes. "Ritsuko, stop trying to cook!" She yelled at the door. A woman with blue hair poked her head out from behind the door. "Well, it's not my fault! I can't…Hello." She said as she saw Sanzo. Sanzo looked around, confused.

Rio tilted her head. "You can't hello? That doesn't make any sense--" Rose put her hand over Rio's mouth. "Should I show you to your rooms, then?" She said to the ikkou. She walked up the steps and stopped at door towards the end of the hall. "Sorry, we only have two rooms left, and they're separated." Rose finally took a good look at them. "Your soaked! Do you want some towels?"

Sanzo coughed. "Your just noticing that?" Hakkai stopped Sanzo. "Yes, towels would be fine." Rose nodded and showed them the other room. She walked down the hall and then down the stairs. Gojyo grinned evilly. "I'd like get some of those girls." Goku punched him in the side. "Sicko!" "We should divide into our rooms, ne?" They all agreed and went to their rooms, Gojyo and Goku in one, and Hakkai and Sanzo in another.

center***

I am aware, for those of you who know a lot alotta Japanese, that 'tabemono' means food. Well, if you knew Rio, you would know why it's called the 'Food Inn' in English. So just shut up and read the rest. ^^ thank you! NEXT CHAPTER: Misunderstandings


	2. Misunderstanding

Hi again! Oh, about Ritusko, Rio, Uma, and Rose…IF YOU TAKE THEM YOUR DOOM WILL BE BROUGHT UPON WITH A PINK-COLORED (Gojyo's hair colored) BANANA. Rose was the one with Brown and Green hair, Rio was the Short one, Ritusko was the Blue haired one, and Uma comes into this chapter. R&R. ^^

***

Hakkai looked gloomily out the window. "Will this rain ever stop?" He heard a knock on his door. Gojyo opened the door and walked in, forgetting to close the door.

"Hey, Hakkai?"

"Yes, Gojyo?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"That depends on what it is."

"What the hell are talking about?"

"Nevermind. What did you want?"

Gojyo sat next to Hakkai and got closer to whisper in his ear. "Did you think that green girl, Rose? Was hot?"

Hakkai made a O_o face. "Gojyo--"

Rose was standing at the door with the towels around her feet. "Oh my! I'm sorry, I didn't know you…you know."

Gojyo looked at her. "What?" Then he looked at Hakkai's extremely and oddly close face. "AH!" they both screamed.

Hakkai looked at Rose. "You don't think we're…me and him? Together?"

Gojyo cleared his throat. "Well, maybe once or twice…"

"GOJYO!" Hakkai glared at him. ##Rose wasn't supposed to know that!## He thought.

Rose gasped. "Well, I don't mind. But, Rio's a little…well, she's the owner and…"

Gojyo stood up. "And What?!"

"She…might kick you out. It will e our little secret. She won't know!"

Just then Rio appeared. "Know what?!"

Rose jumped and screamed. "DON'T DO THAT! I hate it when you do that!"

"Sorry. Know what?"

"Nothing!" The 3 said in unison.

Rio gasped. "THREESOME?!"

Rose shook her head. "NO! NO! It's um… what do you want!?""

"Oh, yeah. That. We're out of food. T.T Help me."

Rose, Gojyo, and Hakkai sighed in relief. Rose smiled. "I'll go get more food!" Hakkai stood up. "Well, it's raining. So, I'll give you a ride." "Thank you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Later)

Gojyo and Sanzo sat on the couch reading newspapers. Sanzo looked at Gojyo over the top of the newspaper. "Gojyo…"

"What?"

"Nevermind."

"Nevermind? What did you want, Sanzo? You want somethin'?"

"Well, I was just thinking about…"  
"About what?"

"About us. Goku and Hakkai and me and you."

"I was just thinking about me and you."

"What?"

"Sanzo…" Gojyo moved closer. He wasn't going to get anything from Hakkai today. So, why not try Sanzo? Suddenly, Goku and Rio popped up between their heads.

Goku smiled. "Guess what?"

"We're hungry."

Gojyo and Sanzo pulled away. Sanzo hit Goku upside the head with his fan. "Shut up. And you…your just like him." He hit Rio upside the head, too.  
"OW!" Rio rubbed her head. "That hurt. And were you guys gonna kiss?!"

Sanzo looked away. "No, you pathetic…wait your not a monkey."

"Stop it with the MONKEY!" Goku yelled.

Rio looked at him. "You're a monkey? That so cute! At least your not the gay one."

Sanzo and Gojyo look at Rio. "Are you serious?"

"Yes, she's serious you pink faggot kappa. I'M the cute one." Goku stuck out his tongue out at Gojyo.

Sanzo shifted. "So, are you two…"

Gojyo laughed. "Steady?!" He seemed to laugh harder.  
Rio and Goku looked at each other. "What did he say?"

"I don't know."  
"He's your friend, monkey.'

"I AM NOT A MONKEY!"

Gojyo sighed. "All right. I'm going." ##Going to tell everyone, you've got a girlfriend, monkey boy.## Gojyo thought to himself.

***

Okay. So it was kinda weird. So what? If you don't like it you don't have to read it. NEXT CHAPTER: What They're All About


	3. What They're All About

Hi again! Again. So, Uma didn't come yet. But she does in this one! I promise!! So… I don't own Saiyuki, but if I did I'd probably only want Goku. OkAy! Here I go! LOL Meemsy.

***

Rio was awoken the next morning by alotta lotta yelling.

"YOU TOLD THEM WHAT?!"

"Just that you and tiny--"

"YOU TOLD THEM WE WERE MARRIED!?"

"No, that you were dating. There's a difference, mmmmonkey boy."

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!"

Rio groaned and stuffed her head into her pillow, almost smothering herself. What time was it? She got up, took a deep breath of air from not having any, and walked out the door.

The tiny innkeeper walked down the stairs with scraggly hair. She dragged herself to the kitchen, only to find out where the noise had been coming from. Goku was trying to strangle Gojyo. She looked at Rose, who pointed to an extremely large plate of meat buns. Rio squealed and grabbed on of the meat buns, almost tripping over Goku and Gojyo's little fight. Sanzo began to get his normal vein-in-the-temple.

"Have the two of you ever heard of PDA?"

Gojyo blinked. "Yeah. Public Display of Affection. Your not supposed to do that."

"Well, why are you?"

Hakkai chuckled. "Maybe they just love each other so much."

Gojyo and Goku glared at them. "Shut up, Hakkai. Sanzo. You started that."

Sanzo shrugged and went back to his paper. Rose cleared her throat.

"Sorry to interrupt your, love affair was it?" Hakkai smiled and shook his head. "Right. Well, there's some--" She went to go point at the plate of meat buns and stopped. "Where did they go?"

A woman with glasses and reddish-orange hair pointed at the table. Rio sat under the table with an almost empty plate of meat buns. She glared at the new woman.

"Curse you, Uma." She said grumpily and shoved the plate away. Goku dived for the plate.

"MINE!!"

Rio came out from under the table and brushed herself off. Uma wrapped one arm around Rio's neck, putting her in a head lock.

"Your dog chased me again."

"So what the hell should I do about it? I can't watch him twenty-four seven!"

"Right. Anyway, what happened to all the other visitors? Why are these four the only ones here."

Ritsuko sighed. "Well, um… they heard about some demons." ^^;;

Sanzo looked up. "You?"

"How'd you guess?"

"You've ALL got fangs. Except Rose. She's doing a good job of hiding them."

Rose smiled and nodded politely. "I'm not really sure what to say to that."

Ritsuko shot her hand out. "Yeah, anyway, I was talking."

^^"Gomen nasai--"

"Shut up. Let me speak my words of wisdom. Anyway, I'm not a demon."

Goku looked at her with a meat bun in his mouth. "mm mfm mm fm?"

"What?"

Hakkai smiled. "He said, 'Then what are you?'" Goku shook his head, then looked at Gojyo and almost lost his meat bun…

Ritsuko smiled brightly. "I'm a vampire."

The whole ikkou seemed to be disturbed by this. Sanzo dropped his newspaper on the floor, Goku swallowed his meat bun…almost whole, Hakkai spit his sake back into his cup, and Gojyo looked over…but then went back to hitting on Uma.

"So, how's about you and me?"  
"How's about you get some brains…or a ticktack! Your breath stinks!"

Goku laughed at that comment. But, Gojyo seemed a little angry.

"You--fine! We're staying until you like me."

"Fine. Stay forever." Uma smirked and ducked under arm.

Rio eyes bulged. O.O "What? Here?! Why?! Don't you have a--a--thing?!"

Gojyo raised an eyebrow. "Yeah. I use it a lot. Hey, you girls wanna try?"

Rio grabbed the meat bun tray and hit Gojyo upside the head leaving a dent in her 'precious' tray; Ritsuko threw Hakkai's sake cup, causing Hakkai to have a mini nervous break down; Uma threw a fork at him; and Rose (being as nice as possible to the perverted kappa) threw a wet towel at his face.

***

So, it was kinda stupid… but yeah. Now you know. I couldn't think of another title so… GOMEN NASAI! Umm… NEXT CHAPTER: Rio's parents…it starts to get a little dramatic.


	4. Rio's Parents

Hi there! Back again! I'm finally updated it after lots of bugging and nagging from some certain people *coughumacough* Okay! Here it goes, R, R, R, and R!ß read, rest, relax, and review! ^^

***

Goku sat in the lobby bored and hungry…as usual. Rose walked up looking a little concerned.

"Hey, Goku."

"Hey."

"Are you hungry?"

"Yeah! How'd you know?"

"Your stomach is very noisy. I'll go make you something, ne?"

Goku simply nodded. Why was Rose so unhappy? Rose got up and walked to kitchen, and Goku looked around for one of the others. Where was everyone? He stood up and stretched just as Rio run up to him looking extremely hyper.

"Goku!"

"What? What's wrong?"

"Nothing! That's exactly it! It stopped raining! Wanna go for a walk?"

"Uh…"

Rose walked out of the kitchen with ANOTHER large plate of meat(y) buns.

"Oh… What's wrong?"

Rio frowned. "Why does everyone think something's wrong!? NOTHING is wrong."

O.O "Okay…sorry I asked."

"Rio said it stopped raining." Goku said.

Rose nodded her head. "Yes. That's probably where everyone has gone- into town."

"Gojyo definitely went there…especially because we saw a lot of women when we first came here." Ø .Ø "He's out picking them up. And Hakkai probably went shopping without me."

"Good! So we can go for a walk!" Rio grabbed Goku's arm and guided him to the door. Goku, before being dragged away, grabbed the plate of meat buns out the door with him. Rose looked at Rio's happy face and smiled. "No one, was meant to be locked up." She said to herself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rio and Goku walked around the town looking at all the shopping stands. Each of them pointed to something different--mostly food, but still each different types of food. Goku sighed.

"I wish Hakkai was here. He would have Sanzo's ABM card."

"You mean ATM card?"

"Yeah, whatever."

Rio stuck out her tongue. "You shouldn't talk to me like that. I have the money." She pulled out a large wallet.

O.O "Where did you get that?!"

"Guh, I run an inn!"

Ø .Ø "Well, you don't have to bite my head off. I was just sayin'*."

They walked around a little more until the sun started to set, then started to walk back to the inn. They got a few yards away from the inn when Rio said: "Go on. I'll catch up."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. Just take some of these bags I've been carrying the heaviest ones all the way."

"Well why didn't you say somethin'? I would've--"  
  
"You can go now."

Goku stopped for a minute. "I--okay." He took the heaviest bags that Rio had been carrying and left he lightest ones. Hey got to the back door of the inn, and looked back at Rio. She was kneeling next to a big stone, looking rather sad…even from that far away.

"That's her father's grave."

Goku sun around to look at Ritsuko. "You! The…what was it again?"

Ritsuko completely ignored him. "Rio's parents were demons…obviously. Her father owned this inn, and her mother was a cook. Rio's job was to take over the inn when her father had retired." Goku looked at Ritsuko surprised. "She was? Did her father retire?"

Ritsuko sighed. "No, unfortunately, he never even got close. He was killed by one of the villagers, because he thought that Rio's father killed his wife and children. Rose had been here, visiting, and--"

"Rose?"

"Yes, those two have known each other longer than I've known them both."

"But, I thought you were Rio's sister…"

"Oh, I am. But, I'm her step-sister." She looked at Goku's face and sighed. "We don't have the same parents by birth, but by marriage." Goku nodded and so Ritsuko went on. "Rose and Rio had been helping Rio's mother cook, when they had heard a crash in the lobby. All three ran out and saw her father being attacked by the villager and a few of his little friends. Rio and Rose had been instructed to go back to the kitchen by her mother, and they did. But, not in time for Rio. She saw her father slaughtered by the villagers. As they were hiding in the kitchen, Rio's mother had run in--with blood one her hands and she was holding a wound. She yelled at Rio and Rose to follow her, and they ran out the back door. The villagers burned the house down, and, the ones who felt awful, took her father's body and buried it over there. The inn was destroyed, but Rio rebuilt it, her mother remarried my father, and Rose worked in the new inn with Rio. And that's the story."

Goku sighed. "Why is she so happy?"

"Well, because she believes that one day she and her father will meet again."

"How so?"

"That's another story. Ask Sanzo, he would know better than me."

Goku looked back at the stone, but Rio was no longer there. {I don't I even have parents…} He thought sadly.

***

Oooookey dokey then. REVIEW IT PLEASE! I guess it wasn't that good, but well, it is my first story--T.T I shouldn't hold that as an excuse…okay! I stink at these stories and I am sorry! *bows* Gomen nasai! *bows again and backs into kitchen*

*Anyway… about the part where Goku says: "I was just sayin'" LOL MY FRIENDS FROM WHICH I GOT THIS IDEA FROM AND WHO ARE HELPING ME RIGHT THIS! (honestly, I can't do it alone…I NEED THEM!) It's just a little joke… O.~ "I'm not passin' judgment. I'm just sayin'…" NEXT CHAPTER: Okay, so I haven't thought of another one yet…T.T GOMEN NASAI!!


	5. Biography of Uma

Hi again!! Here's Uma's chapter written by guess who! Guh…Uma. Oh, and Uma… I just changed it so it would look like it was in a book, I DID NOT change the story line or Gojyo okay?--DON'T HURT ME!!!! ACK! Okay: Here goes! *runs into kitchen and hides* T.T please don't hurt me.

***

Gojyo knocks on Uma's door and she swings it open with a wide smile on her face. Her smiles fades when she sees it's Gojyo and she slams the door in his face.

Gojyo groans. "Aww…C'mon!! Open the door, I just wanna talk!

From the other side of the room, a dagger is thrown at the door. "Yeah, and then your talking lips will 'accidentally' find their way to mine and you'll end up getting slapped. Or, You could try and hit on one of my other friends and you'll end up getting slapped. Well, if you hit on Rio you'll end up getting killed, but that's beside the point. Either way, your gonna get hurt." Another dagger is thrown at the door.

Gojyo sighs. "No…I'm serious!" Gojyo cautiously opens the door and sees Uma lying on her back on a futon on the floor. She's holding a dagger threateningly at Gojyo. Next to her is a basket full of sharp objects.

"I don't what kind of weirdo would take you seriously…anyway, who said you could come in?! Gojyo kneels on the futon and looks at Uma. "If your trying to get some, I suggest you get out now. It's not even worth trying.

Gojyo cracks a bubble with his bubble gum. "I told you. I just want to talk…"

  
"So what do you want?"

"I just want to get to know you better."

There was a short silence…and then a "Why?" from Uma.

"I'm just wondering."*

"Well, I don't know why I'm telling you… but… well…

"It's okay. You can tell me!"

Uma looked at Gojyo strangely. "Okay…Well, I'm the oldest of 4 kids. I'm the only girl; I had 3 brother and my parents were usually never home, so I was normally the mother figure around the house. I learned how to take care of my brothers and when my parents were home… I never got any respect. My father didn't pay any attention to me, and when I spoke to him he would slap. He would tell me never to address him as 'dad', 'father', or otherwise. I was always asked to call him 'sir', like I was a slave or something. That was how he treated me to…like a slave."

Gojyo exhaled. "That horrible… no one should treat such a pretty girl like you that way."

"Yeah, whatever. My mother was my only real friend. She always understood me and listened to me when I had trouble. My father used to forbid her to talk to me, but she sneak into my room at night and comfort me. But one day he must have heard her talking to me and the next day while I was at school… he killed her………" She turned away from Gojyo. Suddenly, Rio ran in.

"Oh my god, Uma." Rio snapped her head at Gojyo. "What did you do to her?!"

O_O' "Nothing! I didn't do anything!"**

Uma sniffled. "It's okay, Rio. He didn't do anything. I'm just telling him about my family."

"…" Rio sighed. "Okay, then." Then she whispered in Gojyo's ear, "If you make any moves on my friend here I'll wring your neck, savvy?"

O_o "Yes'm!!" Rio left the room but, not without giving Gojyo the 'wring-your-neck' sign. Gojyo exhaled, relieved. "I'll…leave… if you don't want to tell me anymore."

"No! Please stay…" Gojyo nodded, so Uma went on. "When I found out he had killed my mother, I ran away. I got a job to support myself… I never had any real friends at the time so I didn't really Have any where to go for shelter and I definitely was not going back home--

  
"I don't blame you."

"So anyway, I spent about 5 years trying to live on my own with no home. It was really no easy. Any money I got I spent on staying at an inn… but not this one. Then one day I had gotten a small raise in my pay at work so I went to buy some food. I, literally, ran into a woman at the market going food shopping also. When I was helping her pick up the things she dropped, she saw me and I could 'a sworn she read my mind or something. She looked at me for a while and then asked me if I could cook. I told her I could cook very well and she offered me a job at her friend's inn because she needed an experienced cook. I would also be able to live at the inn until I got back on my feet. So I went with her to the inn and I got the job. After a while the girl who owned the inn offered me to stay as long as I like."

Gojyo looked at Uma surprised. "Who were the people who helped you?"

"…" Uma sighed happily***. "I'll never forget them. They saved my life and I've never ever had such friends, like Rio, Ritsuko, and Rose. They remind me so much of my mother." Uma finally finished, and scooted over to Gojyo and hugged him. "Thanks so much for listening."

Gojyo hugged her back. *But, the hentai-ness in the kappa came out…* again. "Soooooo… now that I know you better, you wanna--"

"Hahaha--no way. But," Gojyo looked at Uma hopefully. "You got any more gum left?"

"Nah. Sorry."

"Oh, well." Uma kissed Gojyo and then gets up and walks out the door. Gojyo sits there looking some what stunned. Then he notices something was missing. Uma poked her head back in the door.

"Oh, and Gojyo?"

Gojyo turned around. "Yeah?"

"Thanks for the gum!" She blew a bubbled and popped it.

"HEY!!" Gojyo chased Uma out of the room, to retrieve is A.B.C. gum.

***

Okay…. Some Rio-chan notes (no… not author's notes):

*= Gojyo says "I was just wondering." Wondering what? My buddy never specified. ^.^''

**= I was extremely temped to put "I didn't do anything…………yet." But, Uma would have killed me for that so. Yeah.

***=uh… CAN you sigh happily?

*But, the hentai-ness in the kappa came out…*= Yes. I added this. I COULDN'T HELP IT!!! T.T Gomen nasai………………………………don't hit me with Sanzo. I means Sanzo's….fan. Paper fan.

NEXT CHAPTER: Ritsuko the Vampire.


	6. Ritsuko's Night with Sanzo NOT HENTAI!

Hiya! This is Ritsuko's Chappie!!! Oh, and um… if you read this. Please Review!! I'm gonna start putting ((REVIEW OR DIE)) on the best parts to annoy you and ruin the moment until you review. And I WILL START WITH…THIS CHAPTER!!!!!!!! MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA--*cough* HAHAHA--*choke**sneeze**cough* HAHAHA--*cough*

Bakura: Maybe you should stop laughing maniacally. ^.^"""

Rio: Maybe. You think?

Shimbo: I agree.

Rio: OKAY! *grabs onto Shimbo* ¤Chu!¤

Shimbo: O.O

Rio: Oh… and see notes at the bottom. OR YOUR DOOM WILL BE BROUGHT UPON WITH A TAKING MEATBUN!!! Thank you and have a nice day. *never let go of Shimbo*

***

The corrupt monk sighed and leaned against the door. {What a day. Dammit all to Hell where that vampire woman belongs.} He thought bitterly. ((REVIEW OR DIE)) He just wanted to crawl into bed & go to dreamland…where he was safe from 'that vampire woman.' He shuddered at the thought of the hell 'that vampire woman' put him through.

~~FLASHBACK~~

__

Sanzo sat alone at the breakfast table earlier that morning. He refused to eat his breakfast which consisted of pancakes. Pancakes! Fluffy, golden, brown, warm, syrup-drenched pancakes. And bacon. Don't EVER forget the bacon. He leaned back in his chair listening to the beautiful silence that was granted to him. Sanzo shut his eyes. Barely asleep he felt cold breath in his face that smelled…odd. It smelled like blood.* Sanzo opened his eyes and he saw the face of 'that vampire woman' very close to his own and staring peculiarly at him. Sanzo jumped slightly. 'That vampire woman' smiled down at him. "You're a very beautiful man, Sanzo-sama!" She said. Sanzo had a good grip on his…PAPER FAN!! ((Ne, tricked you! I don't know what else it would be. Use your "IMAGINATION!"……Oh and REVIEW OR DIE)) She stood opposite of him. A pink blush tinged on his pale cheeks ((His FACE okay?)) when he realized she only wore black cargo pants, a shirt with sleeves like him………and a matching bra. ((?! Okay… reminder! Rio-chan didn't write this! REVIEW OR DIE!)) Sanzo gulped. "You have a--" He coughed ((Or rather AHEMed)). "--Strange way of dressing, Vampire." He said icily. She blinked.

^_^ "I'm Ritsuko and… I like you!" She leaped across the table and hugged in an odd way that made Sanzo-sama's face meet………((AHEM)) Ritsuko 1 & 2.((RIO-CHAN DIDN'T RIGHT THIS. THIS COMES FROM THE MIND OF RITSUKO HERSELF. REVIEW OR DIE)) She skipped away humming…the Smurf's song.

"That was awkward." Sanzo said to himself.

The many events that took place for Sanzo's "FUNFILLED" day included

1. Getting his ass slapped… 12 TIMES ((O_o))

2. Ritsuko sitting on him

3. Accidentally meeting Ritsuko 1 & 2 again ((*sigh* I hope your getting this. It won't ever come in handy.))

4. Accidentally (seriously) (( - They SAY that… but they do it on purpose… those men. ~Shimbo and Bakura: O_o)) walking in on her when she was in the shower… Poor Ritsuko that time. She smacked him across the face, blushed apologized, and ran into her own room, embarrassed.

5. Plus so much more…

~~END FLASHBACK~~

Sanzo took off his robes which left him in his ((*AHEM*)) spandex and brown pants. 

"HI THERE!!"

As a reflex, he whipped out his revolver** and shot it at the corner of the room. Ritsuko stepped out of the shadows wearing a black knee-length tee-shirt with white letters saying: "BITE ME I'M A WALKING CUISINE" ((Rio, Bakura, and Shimbo: Okay…)) She held out her hand and in her palm was the bullet. 

"This belongs to you." She said.

Sanzo snatched it out of her hand. "How the hell did you do that?!"

"Duh, dude, vampire!"

"How did you get in here?!"

Ritsuko smiled brightly. "The shadows me here!"

"Get out."

"Can't."

"Why not?"

"The door's locked from the outside. We always do that to guest doors."  
  
-.-'' "Why would you do that?"

  
Ritsuko grinned, showing a set of fangs in her mouth. "So they don't get away with out payin'."((*nods* It's true. Rose unlocks them every morning at six… wakes everyone up…they get breakfast then they pay and then they leave--well except the Sanzo-ikkou. It's perfect.))

"Okay… then why don't you use the shadows to get your ass out of here?"

"Dude, traveling by shadow is a one-way trip." She zipped in the blink of an eye and hugged the monk ((priest)) till he couldn't breath anymore. "YAY! We're roomies!" She jumped on the bed. "I get dibs on the bed!"

Sanzo cocked the gun. "Off. That's _my_ bed. _You_ can sleep on the floor." Then Ritsuko was gone. He smirked. When it comes to sleep, he always got his way. "You're forgetting--" It was Ritsuko all right, but she sounded scarier. Deadly. "I move faster than your mortal*** eyes can see. That gun is good for banishing _demons_ to the deepest, darkest pits of Hell, but it's useless against me." Her breath bounced of the back of his neck. Yeah, he was scared… but ((THE STUPID PRIEST)) refused to show it.

"Don't be so arrogant." She reached up to point the gun at her head but…something was missing. ((What could it be??))

"Looking for this?" She was in front of him now. Ritsuko swing the gun around her finger. "So we're both happy… Hows a bout we both sleep on the bed? There's nothing dirty about sleeping." ((Unless your not sleeping.~~ Bakura: Don't you think that your going to make them mad if you keep posting stuff?~~ Shimbo: Yeah!~~ Rio: It's _my_ story and if they don't like it… TOO DAMN BAD!!!~~ Bakura and Shimbo: *cringing* O.O~~ Rio: Review or die. ^.^))

Sanzo sighed. "Fine."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ((WHOO! SWIRLIES!! ~.~ ~_~ ~~ Bakura and Shimbo:…))

"Sanzo! Your hogging the blankets, I'm cold!!"

  
"Tough shit."

For the past 2 hours they tried to sleep.

"Well, I can't sleep. How 'bout you?" said Ritsuko.

"No. Well."

"Well, what?"

"How did you gang up with the others?" Ritsuko shifted uncomfortably. "What's wrong."

"May as well tell you _my_ life story. I know yours."

"Impossible."

"Your old name Kouryuu, you saw your master killed. You're trying to find the Saytan ((How would you spell that?! Or was it Matan?)) scripture stolen from him."

Sanzo was stunned. "H-how--"

"I read your mind."

" I see… I can't deny anything anymore, now can I?"

"No. Anyway, It goes like this… I come from an island, a huge ass one. I'm over 3000 years old, born and raised there. Unlike many others, I was one of the few that were born full-blooded." My mother was killed when I was around…eh, late 2000's. ((Makes it sound like EVERYONE'S story doesn't she? *Is tied up and gagged by Bakura and Shimbo.~~ Bakura and Shimbo simultaneously: That should shut her up.)) I don't remember her that well. But, I know she was very close to me, and I saw her being stabbed to death. The man was a slayer, anyway, he took off. After that, I guess I……… just went insane." She was choking up now. She took a deep breath and exhaled. ((Do vampires even breath?~~ Bakura: WHOA!!~~ Shimbo: How'd you get out?!~~ Rio: I don't know. *Is grabbed* REVIEW OR DI--AHHH!!! *Is gagged again… and roped with chains and a strait jacket.* mmm…)) "I went under a bloodlust. I went after the slayer, mutilated him 'til was nothing left and drained all the blood from his body. But, I didn't end there. I killed at least 2000 people and drank their blood. ((Rio, Bakura, and Shimbo: O.O…)) Then, I saw him."

"Who?"

"He…locked me away. Told me that I couldn't kill anymore. I remember him well. He was a beautiful man, and he looked just like you."

"Who?!"

"…"

"WHO?!"

*"Konzen. Konzen Douji."* Ritsuko said finally. "Then, I was freed. It was my father who freed me. He also told me he remarried. To Rio's mother. We were step-sisters. My father moved away with Rio's mother, I took a human form and lived here ever since."

Sanzo looked at her. Even in the dark, he could see the crimson tears that slid down her pale- moon colored cheeks. He reached over and wipe them away, kissed her cheek and both of them fell asleep. ((AWW!!!))

~~~~~~~~~~~~((ALMOST DONE… FINGERS CRAMPING…AAAAAAAGH!!!!!))

"Well, well, well." The two awoke to the most annoying voice.*-* Gojyo stood there with Rose, who-like I said- opened the door and looked very shocked. "Look who had fun last night." He (Gojyo) busted out laughing.

"GOJYO!!!" They (Ritsuko and Sanzo) screamed.

  
"Shame, too. I was hoping to have go at her." He pointed to Ritsuko.

"Nothing happened!" Ritsuko said. Gojyo wouldn't stop laughing. "Stop laughing or I'll spill your secret. Your having an affair with--" %SPOILER% Gojyo((…She wrote Gojy…)) slammed his hand over her--mouth. ((No…not ass.))

"STOP MIND READING WOMAN!!" Ritsuko bit his hand. "OWIE!!!"

"Delicious AB negative blood." Ritsuko licked her lips.

Gojyo turns pale and runs out of the room screaming. ((LIKE A SISSY GIRL… no *grits teeth* just kidding)) "SAVE ME UMA!!"

Uma smirked. "Nuh-uh."

***  
IT IS OVER!!! OVER!!! OVER DAMN YOU!!!!!! 4 PAGES. THE FINGERS ARE CRAMPING AND I MUST MAKE ANOTHER CHAPTER. Good God.

Bakura:…

Shimbo:…

Rio:…

Bakura:…

Shimbo:…

Rio:…

Bakura:…

Shimbo:…

Rio:…

Anyway.: RIO-CHAN NOTES

*= "_…smelled like blood." _Can humans actually, SMELL blood? I thought that was only animals, demons, etc.!

**= *nervously laughs* I forget what I was gonna put here…

***=Okay… she didn't write that on HER copy… but it sounds more sinister to say "MORTAL" than to leave it out. ^^ Trust me…I know.

*~~~*= Okay… I added his last name. It wasn't on her copy. There WAS something else but… I forget.

*-*= Yes… Gojyo does have the MOST ANOOYING VOICE AWARD in his closet. And yes… IT IS OFFICIAL. But, no… I did not attend. I can't STAND Gojyo. BAKA HENTAI KAPPA. -_- okay I'm done raving.

%SPOILER% The affair…no. Not with Uma………………………but HAKKAI. And now, 4 people--Hakkai, Gojyo, Rose, and Ritsuko-- know about this little *ahem* *in an odd Sanzo voice* love affair. And, despite my cruelness to Hakkai--pairing him with Gojyo--I do like him he's my 2nd favorite char on that show. First it's Goku…then Hakkai…Then it must be CHIBI TENPOU… Then Lirin…then Dokukaguji…then Kougaiji. I hate Houmei (EPS 2 *BLEH*) and Ni. He's annoying… O_o o_O

NEXT CHAPTER: Rose is Rose.((yes I did get this off of a comic strip. Urusai. *Hits you with Bakura's millennium necklace. Bakura: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Rio: Eh, It was evil anyway.))


	7. Rose is Rose

Hi…again. This is Rose's Chapter. OKAY HERE GOES!!! Oh, and I have a new toy-er-friend with me here today!! ^^

Hyato: . . What…?

Shimbo and Bakura: You.

Hyato: …

Bakura: *whispering* We better gag her ahead of time…

Shimbo: *whispering* Good idea.

Rio: WHATCHA DOIN'?!

Bakura and Shimbo: *Gag Rio ahead of time…straight jacket, chains, gag, chair… all that jazz.*

Hyato: O.O WHAT DID YOU DO?!

Bakura and Shimbo: **R**est, **R**elax, **R**ead, and **R**eview.

***

Rose and Hakkai sat--well--kneeled on the porch drinking tea… well, Hakkai is drinking--three guesses. You'll only need one--sake. Actually, it was Rose's home-made sake. Hakkai sighed. "It so peaceful here."

"You should see it when the Sakura trees bloom. It's like--um…"

  
"Heaven?"  
  
Rose smiled. "Better. Especially when it's shared with friends like Rio, Ritsuko, and Uma."

"I'm sure it is." ^.^

Rose took a drink from her tea, and Hakkai from his sake. Rose cleared her throat. "So, how long have you and Gojyo been…"

"Huh? What?! Oh, no, we just…um…"

Rose laughed. "It's all right. I know and Ritsuko knows. Uma and Rio are the only one's who don't know…it will take them a while to figure out, too. They are--well-- very simple-minded. You know…Rio can't even read very well…"

"Really?"  
  
"Yes. She can read names and small words, but very long words are…hard for her. I still try though."

"Try?"

"To teach her." Rose sighed. "If only life was simple. So, what's with that scar?"

"What?! How do you--?"

"Uh… well…" Rose blushed. "Do you remember when you had to get that pan for me?"

"…"

"Well--" She blushed even more. "Your shirt went up a little and I saw it."

"…" Hakkai started to blush a little, too.

  
"I wasn't looking or anything but…oh, forget I asked." Rose was so red now, that she _looked_ like a red rose.

Hakkai inhaled. "It--was from a fight."

"Oh… okay."

A few minutes passes and neither of them had looked at each other since Rose had asked about the scar.

"3 years." Hakkai blurted out.

"What?"

"You asked how long…Gojyo and I…3 years." Rose nodded. "Do you think it's weird?" Hakkai asked.

Rose smiled. "No."

"No?"

"No. You love who you love. You can't change the that…like you can't change the past, and you can't change other people." Hakkai looked at Rose who was looking at some far off distance.

"You really believe that?"

"Yes. That is what _I_ believe. Everyone thinks differently. Rio thinks it's okay…but she's not too fond. She won't care…but it might freak her out at first, unless she gets to know you before she tells you-and it also depends on whether she likes you or not. It scares Ritsuko…no maybe not. No. Maybe it was Uma. Well, It scared one of them. It might have been Uma…"

O.O "Okay…" He took another sip of his sake and put the cup down. "You have some weird friends."  
  
"Likewise."

  
"Ha ha. Yeah, a corrupt monk, a monkey, and well…Gojyo."

"What _is _Gojyo anyway?"

"I'm not sure I understand you."

"Well, he… wants Uma. But, in a different way… he wants you."

Hakkai was sipping his sake, but spit out what was in his mouth. "Say what?!"

Rose looked shocked. O.O "Um… okay. That was--not the reaction I was expecting. Um… You know your very unpredictable."

ó.O "Oh, really? Me?!"

^^'' "Okay… me, too." Hakkai looked at her from the side in a very…*AHEM* Sanzo-like way. Rose gulped. "Scary…"

Hakkai looked down at the porch. "Gomen nasai."

"Huh?"

"I got sake--and spit-- all over the porch." ^^

"Don't worry about it, Hakkai." Two people--and elderly woman and a small boy--walked towards the inn in the distance. Rose saw them and gasped, then stood up and ran into the inn. The elderly woman finally got to the inn with the boy. Hakkai gasped. The little boy… looked so…so… familiar. His eyes… {_Rose?_} Hakkai thought.

"Hello, young man." The elder woman snapped Hakkai back to his senses.

"Yes, ma'am?"

"Is Rio-chan or Reika-chan here?"

{_Reika? Who's that?_} "Yes. Rio's inside."

"Thank you." The woman and the boy walked inside, but not before the boy took one last glance at Hakkai. Hakkai stood up and poked his head in.

``````````````````````````--change of scenery. ((~~~~~~~~~~~~~Change of time--not now though))

"Rio-chan! Hello!" The woman had said. Rio looked up from the desk.

"HELLO!! Hi, Kiyo-chan!"

The little boy finally looked away from Hakkai. "Aunt Rio!" The little boy ran over to the desk and Rio ran out from behind. She picked up the little boy and balanced him on her hip. The woman cleared her throat. "So…where is Reika?"

Rio looked surprised. "I-I--"

"Rio."

"She's--I--can't say."

"She told you not to say didn't she?" Rio nodded. The woman sighed. "Why?"

"It's been…2 years. There is no one by that name… left." Rio looked up and saw Hakkai. She looked back at the woman and put the boy down. "I have…to do something." She walked over to Hakkai and grabbed his arm. They walked into the kitchen and out the back. Rose stood there looking dazed…but not confused. Rio looked at her. "She asked for Reika…again."

"I know. She always does."

"Maybe…" Rio looked at Hakkai. "you should talk. They---he---has seen already."

Rose nodded and turned to Hakkai. "Well, like I said you can't change the past…"

Hakkai gasped. "What? What are you--"

"Kiyo… that is my son."

"Your son…?"

Rio shook her head. "Just listen."

"Kiyo's father was…" It seemed she couldn't bring herself to say his name. "An evil man… he--did this to many women…"

Hakkai clenched his fist. He thought he knew. "Hyakugan Maoh."

Rose's smile left her face. "You know him. Somehow… I don't think that's good."

"No…it isn't."

"Well, he is Kiyo father. Many woman killed themselves after he got a hold of them, and after they found out they were pregnant with his child. But," She looked at Rio. "I just couldn't… not after I still had people there for me." Rio winked and put up a peace sign, apparently trying to lighten the mood. I didn't seem to work very well, so she put her hand down. "Anyway, it didn't end there… I had a husband then and--even though Kiyo wasn't his--we were very happy. But, one day-- my father must have found out about Kiyo. We hadn't told him because of this reason… but it turned out worse than we thought. He must have insane. He took and ax and started swinging it around. He tried to hit Kiyo, who was only a year or two old at the time." Hakkai gasped. Rose must have heard. "Yes… and he would have gotten Kiyo, if I hadn't just in front, my back facing him." She put a hand on her back.

  
"That's how she got the scar." Rio said. Hakkai looked down at Rio, nodded, then looked back at Rose.

"So, my mother took Kiyo and ran out of the house. My father struck at Takuyou, who didn't get out of the way in time… and, well, let's just say I was the only one that got out. My father realized what he did, and he, too, never walked out." Rose looked out to some distant place again. "After that…I changed my name. I never wanted to hear that name again. But, my mother insists on calling me Reika!" She clenched her fists. 

"You can't change the past." Rose looked up and over at Hakkai, who was looking at her. "Nor can you run from it." Rose sighed.

"I guess not…" She turned around and walked inside, with Hakkai and Rio following. She walked into the lobby and kneeled down on just one knee. "Kiyo!" She said and the boy from before turned around.

"Mommy!" He ran to her and she picked him up and put him on her knee like Rio had done earlier. Rose seemed happier again. Rio ran halfway up the stairs and yelled up "UMA! RITSUKO! GET YOUR ASSES DOWN HERE!!! Don't make me come up there and get you!!"

"WHAT FOR?!!" Ritsuko voice sounded. 

"THE TANAKA'S ARE HERE YOU…YOU…POOP!!" With that Ritsuko and Uma ran down the stairs so quick…it seemed that they were followed by smoke. Rio followed them down and stood in front of the elderly woman. "Mitsako-san!" The three said simultaneously. "Did you bring any sweets this time?!"

***

Shimbo: Phew! Just as long as Ritsuko's!

Hyato: *points to Rio* Shouldn't we untie her…?

Bakura and Shimbo: *look back* …

Hyato: …

All 3: NAH.

NEXT CHAPTER: Shimbo: Uh…what _is _the next chapter?~~ Bakura: I don't know…~~ Hyato: We'll tell you when we find out.~~ All 3: Ja ne! *wave*


	8. ThE fRuItY fOrTuNe PeOpLe

Ohayou! Konnichiwa! Konbanwa! Or what ever time it is…there…at your home…or where ever your computer is located at the time. Okay. This is a freaky chapter about a visit from two fortune tellers. And no, _neither_ of them Chin Yisou. (Or whatever his name is…) It might be a little…note-ish.

EXAMPLE: Man #1: Hi.

Man #2: Hey. How are ya?

Man#3: Good.

Okay! ^^ Here we go! XD

***

Goku sat next to Rio behind the desk, as she showed him all about inn-caring. Uma, when Rio and Goku had there backs turned had jumped up on the desk, and when Goku turned around again she said: "Ohayou*, anal-dwelling butt monkey!"

Goku screamed and fell backwards and Rio's eyes followed him. She then looked back at Uma. "Anal-dwelling butt monkey?"

"Yeah."

"Okay…"

"It means--"

"I know what it means!" As Rio said this, Goku's hand shot up from the floor. Rio grabbed it and pulled him up. Two people dressed strangely walked into the inn. They were a man and a woman. The woman was young and pretty, and the man was also young, but handsome. They both walked up to the desk, and the man put his hand on the desk gently.

"Ohayou." He said. His voice was clear, mystical, and a little mysterious. "May we have a room?"

Rio looked up. "Yeah, sure. Can I have you names?" Goku and Uma looked at each other, then walked away in different directions.

"Hoshi. And I am Hoshiko." When the woman spoke, it was…in an odd way…beautifully clear and mystical, like the man's-but softer.

"Okay." Rio wrote down the name, and Ritsuko stormed down the stairs with some man. When they got closer, Rio saw that Ritsuko was grabbing the man by the neck.

"This man…_spied_… he _spied _on me! While I was in the shower!!" Ritsuko shouted angrily. "He just admitted it to me when I threatened to rip out his throat.

Rio looked at the man and held out an extended hand.

"What do _you _want?" The man said with an attitude.

"My money." Rio said as if she didn't believe he just asked.

"Nani? "

"I want what's rightfully mine. Your wallet. Give it to me, or I'll take it." Rio's changed from happy-go-lucky-and-optimistic to evil and menacing for a girl her size.

"Shinjirarenai."

"Believe it." Rio snapped. The man reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. He threw it to Rio and Rio, in turn, took out all his money, stuffed in her _own _pocket, and threw it back. She nodded to Ritsuko, and Ritsuko took the man and threw him out. Rio followed them and stuck her head out the window.

"You'll surely be in my prayers tonight!!" She yelled over at him while waving sweetly. The man gave her the finger, which pissed Rio off to no end. "Like I said, you'll be in my prayers. AND I'LL BE PRAYING YOU GET **_NUT CANCER_**!!!!" She slammed the door shut and returned to her desk. Ritsuko walked over to the kitchen to--yet again--annoy Sanzo.

"Now…" ^^ Rio said to Hoshiko and Hoshi. "We have a free room, ne?" The two people looked at each other and sweat dropped.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Everyone's favorite hentai no kappa, Gojyo, sat on the porch watching all the 'hot chicks' that were staying at the inn. Hoshiko (the fortune teller _woman_) walked up to him.  


"You must be Gojyo. Sha Gojyo."

Gojyo sat up. "Hai*…"

Hoshiko smiled. "Would you like me to tell your fortune?"

Gojyo grinned evilly. He hoped she would say something about his love life, so he answered "Hai," again.

The fortune teller lady sat across from Gojyo and seemed to go into a trance. "Sha Gojyo…" She said. "I foresee…that the next woman you hit on…"

"Hai?!"

"…Will be…many a year older than you…and in fact not… be a woman at all…" She opened her eyes and looked at him. "Well, I hope that's okay for now!" She stood up and walked away."

Gojyo looked at the woman puzzled. "That was stupid!" He said aloud, just as a beautiful woman walked by. And guess what our kappa did? He ran off after her, guh. What else?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rio, Goku, Hakkai, and Rose sat in a circle. Rose and Hakkai were playing Mahjong, and Rio and Goku were watching--neither of them knowing how to play. As Hakkai looked at his pieces Hoshi (the male fortuneteller) came up.

"My, my… what two lovely women here. And men…" Rose sweat dropped as Hakkai looked up and behind him at the man. Goku looked at the man wide-eyed and Rio hugged Goku.

"Would _you _like to be in my prayers, too, Fruity Mr. Fortune-Man?**" Rio snapped at him.  
  
"No, that's quite all right. You should learn to take a compliment Missy."

"That's Missy-sensei to _you_, buster."

"But, you aren't teaching me anything…"

"Yes I am. I'm teaching you to stay away from _my _saru."

"Wait…" Goku cut in. "How am I _yours_?"

"Because I said so. That's why. _Don't_ argue with me." Rio said seriously.

Goku: "Okay!" ^^

Hoshi, Rose and Hakkai: "…?"

Hoshi: "Can I finish what I was saying?"

Rose and Hakkai: "Can we finish our game?"

Rio and Goku: "When's lunch ready?"  
  
Rose and Hakkai: "Our game…"

"Fine…" Rio pouted. "Hoshi, talk. **_Now_**."

"Okay," Hoshi started. "Who wants me to tell their fortune."

Goku shook his head. "Not me. And not Hakkai."

Hakkai in the background: "I can answer for myself…"

Goku ignored him. "The last time Hakkai met a fortune teller," He put his two front fingers on the side of his head and swirled them around making the 'crazy' sign. "He went nuts." He put his hands back down. "It was really weird. _I _even broke my leg!"

Rio piped up. "You can tell mine!!"

"Okay…" said Hoshi, unsure. "Wellllll…" He seemed to go into a trance. "You…will soon…kill someone…" ((Short but scary, still))

Rio blinked. "Nani? Kill?" Q.Q "Oh, no! I'm gonna commit murder!" T.T "WAAAAAAAH!!!" She started to cry and Goku hugged her.

  
(Goku speaking) "It's okay! He's just kidding! Rio-chan, don't cry!"

Hakkai looked at Hoshi. "You started the faucet, now stop it!"

"Nani?! What are you talking about?" That was Hoshi.

Hakkai sighed. "You made her cry, now stop her!"

"Oh, right! Rio-chan! Don't cry!! Look, Breath in…breath out. Breath in…breath out. In with the good…out with the bad. In with the good…out with the bad. Smell the scent of Lavender!" Hoshi said, with a sweet, calm voice.

Rose tried to stifle a laughter. "Smell the scent of Lavender? I know I'm not one to say this usually, but…You really are gay aren't you?"

"Just a little." Hoshi answered. "Right, bishie?" He winked at Hakkai, who in turn mad a face like this:

O_O "EEEEP!!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~THAT NIGHT~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rose walked down the stairs and into the kitchen at about…eh…midnight-ish. As she walked in, she saw:

Gojyo: sitting in the corner in a fetal position.

Hakkai: In the other corner in a fetal position.

Uma: sitting in the sink eating her pancakes.

Rio: At the table crying her eyes out.

Goku: Trying to comfort Rio; also had a meat bun in his mouth.

Sanzo: At the table reading a newspaper.

Ritsuko: Hovering over Sanzo; also trying to annoy him…yet…again…

Rose sweat dropped. "_Nobody _can get to sleep?!"

Sanzo: "How could you tell?"  
  
"Because everyone's awake. Why?"

Hakkai: "This is the only time I'll be here like this… but…" He stood up and ran over to Rose and grabbed her hands. "THAT FRUITY-ASS FORTUNE _MAN_--**_MAN_**--HIT ON ME!!! 4 TIMES TODAY, ROSE!!!"

Rose: "Please don't scream. Some straight people are trying to get their sleep…"

"THAT'S NOT FUNNY!!!"

"Sumimasen*." ^^

Gojyo: "That fortune woman told me my fortune, she said the next woman I hit on would be older, and actually be a man! And you know what!?"

"No. What?"

"She was right!! It turned out, that the woman I hit on…was 64 and she had an over dose on Botox!"

"You know, that reminds me of a saying. When your on a roll, in a game or something, you say: 'Who put the Botox in my buttocks?' Sorry, that just reminded me."

"Yeah, okay. Anyway, this 64 year old _hag_ tell me she's not only _OLD _she's also not a _SHE_! They just had really long hair and wore make-up! **I WAS HITTING ON A MAN!!**"

Rose blinked. "And that surprises me because…?"

"Yeah!" Ritsuko piped up. "You hit on Hakkai all the time!" At this, Uma dropped her pancake and gasped.

"Your **_gay_**?!" Uma goes into shock for a while, trying to regroup her thoughts.

Rose: "And what's wrong with Rio? Hakkai, please let go." Hakkai was stealing holding her hands apparently traumatized.

"Sorry." He said, and let go.  
  
Rio lifted her head up and tears where streaming down her face. "I had to kill a squirrel…" Q.Q

"What?" Rose asked.

"A squirrel. I had to kill it. It got run over by a big stupid truck and it half dead, so I had to kill--kill--WAAAAAHHHH!!!!" She hugged Goku again.

"She had to put it out of it's misery." Goku said hugging her back.

"I wish someone would do that for me…you are all ANNOYING!!" Sanzo yelled from behind his newspaper."

Ritsuko had an evil grin. "You know what? I think we should play a trick on them… those fortune people…oh, yeah."

Rose smiled. ^^ "I have an Idea!"

**__**

To Be Continued…*dun dun dun*

***

****

Rio-chan Notes

*=All these stars, are Japanese words, and some of my readers may not know what it means. *^^* Here's a chart-type thing.

****

Japanese=English

Ohayou= Good morning

Shinjirarenai=Unbelievable

Sumimasen= another way of saying 'I'm sorry.' rather than Gomennasai. This is less formal than Gomennasai, too. Gomennasai has a childish ring to it, so it's more like something Goku, Rio, Uma or Ritsuko would say. Sumimasen is for older people or people your not familiar with. Rose says this because she's only known Hakkai and Co. for a week. Also, Sumimasen can be used for gratitude or thanking someone, and you can't do that with Gomennasai. Well, you could, but no one would know what the hell your talking about. They would think you were saying "Sorry," instead of "Thanks!"

**=Fruity Mr. Fortune-Man…aha. That was an inside joke between me and my friends.

NEXT CHAPTER: Revenge on the Mystical Ones.


	9. They're WHAT!

Hi again. After much…eh, longness, I am updating! Yay. ⌐⌐ Hear the enthusiasm in my voice…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Rose walked into the kitchen and saw a figure in a fetal position in the corner. She walked over to it and saw it was Hakkai. "What's from Hakkai-san?"

Hakkai looked up. "NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE!"

Rose: …okay. I can't help you if you don't know what's wrong…

Hakkai: S…sa…sak…sake…sake…

Rose: You want some sake? I'll get you some…hold on.

She walked over to the cupboard…or wherever they keep sake…and walked back with some in her hands.  
  
Rose: You want a cup?

But before she could finished the question, the empty sake cup was back in her hands.

O.O;; "Oh…dear me…"

Hakkai sighed. "Okay…it goes like this…"

****

FLASHBACK

Hakkai walked out of the bathroom and towards his room. Just as he reaches the door, a hand grabs his shoulder. Before he can see who it is…or even think, he is pushed into his room and onto the bed. He looks up and sees Hoshi standing at the doorway.

Hoshi: You know, I was waiting for you to wake up…  
Hakkai: ………………O.O OH PLEASE NO!!!

As Hoshi comes in for Hakkai, Hakkai gets up and runs out of the room.

Hoshi: Damn…almost had him.

****

END FLASHBACK

Rose had her hands over her mouth. "Oh, dear…poor baby…"

"What?!"  


"Oro? Oh, no! I'm not hitting on you! I was just kidding…" ^^;;

"Oh…" Both of them blushed.

Rose stood up. "Anyway, how about you lock your door?"

"_He's _in there."

"Well, I guess we can switch rooms for a night…until the plan takes affect…"  
  
"Plan?"

"Oh…it's nothing…I wish I could tell you. But I can't."

  
"Oh. Was that the plan that Rio made up?"

"…Hai…"

"Will it work?"

The two looked at each other.

"…"

"…"

~~~~~~~~~~The Next Morning~~~~~~~~~~

Uma bounced down the stairs. "Ohayou gozimasu.*"

Rose smiled. "Ditto."

Hoshi and Hoshiko walked down the stairs. Hakkai suddenly appeared behind Rose and put his hands on her sholders. Hoshi saw him and grinned. "Hakkai-san."

Hakkai simply smiled. Rose smiled, too. Thus there was a double vision of: ^_^

Uma blinked. "Did I miss something?"

Rio, Gojyo, Ritsuko, Goku and Sanzo walked down the stairs too--each looking like the undead…and well, sleeping undead. Rio looked the worst.

"What…are they still here?" She said rubbing her eyes. *YAWN*

Hoshi walked up to Hakkai and began to talk, but was cut off by Hakkai himself.

"So," ^_^ "Has anyone heard the news?"

Gojyo looked up. "What news?"

Rio looked awake and hyper. "A NEW TYPE OF FOOD?!"  
  
Rose smiled. "No, Rio…sorry."

⌐⌐ "Don't kid around like that. I thought it was important."

"Oh, but it is!"

Ritsuko scratched her head. "Huh-wha?"

Sanzo's eye twitched. "Just freaking tell us already!!"

Hakkai smiled. "Rose and I are…"

All: "Yes…"

Rose: "Hakkai and I are…"

All: "Yes?!"

Hakkai and Rose: "Engaged!"

All: O.O NANI?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Oh, my… What a twist…Hakkai engaged? O.o What will I think of next?! Yes, okay its sucked and EVERYONE was OoC…I can'y wait till I finish the _next _chapter!! The next few chapters will be so great!! Oh, and the end is coming soon so…yeah. Enjoy the rest. By the way…**FLAMES WILL BE IGNORED. **Well, I they're REALLY REALLY mean. T.T Don't make me feel so bad…


	10. Just a fill in chapter so I can get rid ...

Hiya! How did you like my last chapter and it's speeling (J/K) SPELLING and such and the engaging and the Hakkai in love thing? well………………………………ON WITH THE CHAPPIES!!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Gojyo: HAKKAI!! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?! TO US?!

Hakkai: ⌐⌐ Well, it wasn't like there was something going on anyway…

Gojyo: Oh, just make me feel worse why don't cha?

Hakkai: ^_^ If I didn't know better I would swear I had as soon as I told you about me and Rose!

Gojyo: Funny…. ⌐⌐ NOT.

Sanzo: NOOOOOO! NOW WE'RE FRIGGIN' STUCK HERE TILL _YOU _GET MARRIED YOU SHIT!! I'LL KILL YOU!!!

Goku: Will there be food at the wedding?

Rio: Yeah…

Uma: OH MY GOOD GOSHNESS!!! NOW I'LL BE RELATED TO THE RED HAIRED ONE!!!!

Gojyo: AND WE WON'T BE ABLE TO GET IT ON!!!!! ***_THWACK_*** Pain…suffering…my poor extremities…

Rio: ó.O Exsqueeze me?

Ritsuko: Are you two even brothers? Wait, and you two were in love?! WHOA!!!

Hakkai: I AM NOT HIS BROTHER!!!!

Rose: Uma's not my sister…

Uma: Oh, well that's cool.

Gojyo: Cool! Now we can-- ***_THWACK_***

Rio: I don't wanna know.

Hoshi and Hoshiko: What about us?

Gojyo, Hakkai, Rose, Uma, Rio, Ritsuko, Sanzo, and Goku *takes deep breath*: NO ONE WANTS TO MARRY YOU TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hoshi: ⌐⌐ just leave us out of everything…

Hoshiko: ⌐⌐ Why don't you.

Rio: youknowyouguyscanhavecakesandicecreamandwecanallhaveagoodtimeandwecaneatandbehappyand-thenwhenyoutwogetababywe'llhaveaparentspartyandthey'llbelotsafoodand--

Hakkai: Rio…speak slowly and take deep breaths…

Rio: you know you guys can have cakes and ice cream and we can all have a good time and we can eat and be happy and then when you two get a baby we'll have a parents party and there'll be lots a food and--

Rose: Whoa, what baby?!

Hakkai: ^_^;

Uma: Wait, I'm confused… --;

Ritsuko: *emerges from her little world at 'baby'* WHOA!! ROSE IS PREGNANT?!?!?!

Sanzo: Wait…is she?

Goku and Rio: Are you? Wait, what's that mean?

Uma: When you have babies. 

Gojyo: OMG!!! NOW HE'S GOT A KID?! Dude, slow…down…

Hakkai: I didn't _do _anything--or anyone…….yet…

Rose: *angry face* You were planning to?

Gojyo: Yeah, Uma.

  
Hakkai: NO!!!

Hoshi and Hoshiko: What about us?

All others: URUSAI!!! 

Hoshiko: Hmph.

Hoshi: hn…

Rio: Okay…we should talk about this…

Rose: Your not the one getting married…

Uma: Do you even have a ring?

Rose: ……………….oh yeah….

Hakkai: ………………..um….

Rio: ………………..I'm Hungry.

Gojyo: …………I need a smoke….this too overwhelming

Sanzo: ………………….Me, too….but I don't really care about this whole…love thing.

Ritsuko: ………………………..What love thing? Oh….the wedding…Who's getting Married?!

Uma: ………………………………...........I think Hakkai and Rose…yeah them.

Goku: ……………………………….............................................I'm hungry.

Hakkai: Now she tells me about the ring…--; I completely forgot.

Rose: …HOW COULD YOU FORGET THE MOST IMPORTANT PART?!

Ritsuko: You know, this isn't even romantic.

Uma: you wouldn't know romantic if it came up and ate all your innards through a straw!

Ritsuko: Who's Romantic.

Rose: Hakkai _should _be…

Ritsuko: Hakkai's got a middle name?

Rio and Uma: me mo mimey mo ma me mo me. Me mo mimey mo ma me mo me. DOOPY DOOPY DOOP DA DOOP DOOP DA DOOP. Me mo mimey mo ma me mo me. Me mo mimey mo ma me mo me.

Gojyo: What the hell does that have to do with anything?

Sanzo: Has anyone noticed those two left without paying? Oh, no wait….it's on the counter…

Rio: *attacks the money* MY MONEY!!! MY BEAUTIFUL _FOOD BUYING _MONEY!!!!!

Rose and Hakkai: --; I CAN'T TAKE IT ANY MORE!!!!

All others: Oro?

Rose: okay…we aren't REALLY engaged…

Rio: ………Shit…no food.

Sanzo: ………Shit….no free cigars…

Gojyo: ………Shit…no bachelor party…

Goku: ………Shit…no food… wait that was already said…

Ritsuko: ………Shit…no hot DJ's blood to suck…

Uma: ………YES!! NO FRILLY DRESSES!!…Shit! No dress _shoes_…Great…now I'm hungry. Goku gimmie your shoe!

Goku: Why me?!

Rose: AHEM!!!  
  
Hakkai: This was our plan to get them away, okay?!

Uma, Gojyo, Sanzo, Rio, Goku, Ritsuko: ………………………………Who?

Hakkai and Rose: *anime fall*

Rose: AGH!!!

Hakkai: You people…--; I can't believe I travel with some of these idiots…

Gojyo, Goku, Sanzo: What's that, Smiles?!

Hakkai: ^_^;; I mean…perfectly handsome single men…

Goku, Gojyo, Sanzo: Thank you.

Hakkai: Who have holes in their heads and their brains are spilling out except for Goku who does not, in fact, have any brains at all!

Goku: WHY THE HELL AM I THE STUPIDEST ONE!?!?!?  
  
Gojyo: because you are.

  
Rio: Besides you look cuter that way.

Goku: URUSAI!!!! ⌐⌐

Rio: Hey, I gave a complement!

Sanzo: It's getting late, I guess we have to stay just ONE MORE NIGHT.. Only one!!!

Rio: Okay….that's 10 nights…10,000 yen.

  
Sanzo: WHAT?!

Rio: ó.o What do I look like? A charity machine?

Hakkai: *sigh* I guess we should go to bed now.

Rose: Yes…

Everyone walks up to they're rooms seemingly happy. Except Rose and Hakkai, who slowly walked up to they're rooms, thoughts going through their head which are appropriate only for PG rated mushness…And this is a PG-13 story which should have mildly hentai things and cuss words….so I won't go there…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Rio: Okay…that is the stupidest chapter ever. 

Uma: But, don't worry! The next one will be stupider!

  
Rio: Shut your face.

Uma: T-T I'm so unloved…

Rio: yes--

  
Uma: I only said that because I wrote part of it!

Rio: SHUT YOUR FOOD TRAPPER!!!

Uma: Food trapper?

Rio: I'm hungry…. 'gimmie your shoe!'

Uma: NO! THAT' S _MY _LINE!!!

Rio: What …*LIKE* EVER!!!

  
Uma: PS--It's High Five Day! High FIVE!! *bops Rio in the face*

  
Rio: No…it's National Make Fun of Preppies Day!

  
Uma: Your only saying that 'cuz we had a Prep--I mean--Pep Rally!

Rio: -.- So?

Goku: I'M HUNGRY!!!!!!!!!

Rio: GOKU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MUCH LOVIINN!!! *glomps Goku*

Gojyo: I think I'm gonna barf…

  
Uma: I think I'm about to hug you! MUCH HUGGINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *glomps Gojyo*

Gojyo and Goku: *suffocating*

Rio: Any who….The next chappie will be funny/romantic ness. Kay bye!

****

(FLAMES ARE ACCEPTED FOR THIS CHAPTER. I ONLY WROTE THIS CHAPTER BECAUSE I HAD TO GET RID OF THOSE STUPID FORTUEN PEOPLE)


End file.
